In a former professional incarnation under a former nom de plume, I used to have a lot of fun with literary meanderings and letting my imagination go off at a tangent, but it's something I've not done for a while (at least not publicly).
However, my girlfriend Sarah and I were at a gig last week waiting for the band and we started playing round with various 'fundraising' band names and imagining what types of bands they might be.
So Sarah and I present 11 raisertastic pop acts that might have been.
Case for Support - heavy metal group, once supported Motorhead at Knebworth. Just the once though so failed to live up to their name.
PenPak - White American rapper notorious for his parental advisory lyrics.
RoI - 1990s American indie band. Had a global smash with 'What's the Frequency Recency Value, Kenneth?'
Attrition Rate - Thrash death metal. Very noisy. Guitarists leave every six months; drummers every four. But lead singers break even after a year.
The Ask - mod revival band from '79, totally forgettable cover of 'Money (That's What I Want)' trashed in charts by the Flying Lizards' version.
Dorothy Donor - 70s folky-type outfit. Didn't they sing some song about going on a sponsored walk to Bangor?
Face2Face - south London teenage girl duo. Their gimmick was to jump off stage and 'accost' members of the audience.
Telephone Preference Service - early 70s prog rock band. Clearly ahead of their time.
Don8 - Girl group manufactured by popraising impresario Bill Bruty. Every member was called Raechelle Greene (sorry, bit of an old in-joke but some of you will get the reference).
Control Pack - 1980s Europopsters with big hair. Everyone remembers their big hit 'The Final Mailpack'.
The Gurus - Who can forget that famous gig at Shea Stadium when Ed Sullivan introduced them with those immortal words: 'Honoured by the Institute of Fundraising, decorated by Professional Fundraising magazine, here they are, Ken, Tony, Alan and Pidgo - THE GURUS!'
If you're a fan of any other fundraising-related beat combos, do post them on this thread.